Skin Check In

My skin is breaking out bad and I don't know why.
Usually it's because it's "that time of the month" but not this time.
And its only on the right side of my chin and mouth area and they're painful pimples.

Okay, maybe I have an inkling it's the cheese and dairy I've had, because I can break out from dairy but it's never been this bad or long.
I've had pizza quite a lot. . .

I've been trying to treat these pimples, so if what I use works I will let you know.
Also, I tried the Pixi Glow Peel Pads (again) and they dried my skin out for over a week.  I have never had sand paper skin the way I did this past week.  The first time I used the pads I didn't even notice a difference. This last time was much different.
The Glow Tonic works well for me, but these pads are a no go.
I would recommend the First Aid Beauty facial radiance pads over these, but that's just me.
My skin is typically on the drier side.

Lately for acids I've been using the lactic, glycolic, salicylic and hyaluronic acids from The Ordinary.
They work best for my, apparently, sensitive skin.

Then I like to also use the Caudalie Instant Detox Mask, I think it's a miracle worker. I haven't bought it in almost a year and just repurchased it because I realized I missed it and it was one of the products that really helped my skin.

Because I use those acids I try to keep my moisturizer pretty basic and use the Eucerin facial moisturizer as it's hydrating and just simple.

I also LOVE the Glow Recipe watermelon sleeping mask, it is amazing, you just need to try it to understand.

I have no updates on eye cream, because I miss my beloved Shiseido eye cream but can't justify the price until there is a sale.
For now the Olay ultimate eye cream is working, but it's nothing compared to the above.
If you have any suggestions on an affordable eye cream it would be greatly appreciated.

I'm curious what you're using in your skin care routine (I love skin care) or if you have any tips for break outs. Thanks!

I Hate Being Lonely

I like being alone but I hate being lonely.

I feel like this sums me up very well.

When I feel lonely, my world goes south.
Does that make sense?

This is worse on my days off.
My Love is away working right now, it's almost been two weeks and it never gets easier.

He mostly works at this time of year (my favorite time-Autumn). Last year he was gone for three weeks then home for four days and then gone another month.
Last year was hard.

I'm very grateful he got this job, as he loves it and he is respected more than some of his other jobs he has.  Overall, we're both happy.
It's these lonely moments that get me.
I know it must be hard for him as he's away from everything and everyone, his home.
But as my mental health has always been an issue, I find it especially hard.


Yesterday was a big feat for me, I was quite happy with myself.
I went out shopping, like fun shopping, by myself.
Since you don't know me, just to let you know this is big deal for me.
It's great if I do groceries by myself, I think I over came that last year though, but I still like to call my Mom to go with me on particularly anxious days.
I have not done fun shopping by myself in years.  I used to take the bus all the time in my early twenties, I don't know what happened.
I used to even go see movies by myself and some of those movies are my favorites because I was by myself when I saw them!

Anyways, I didn't come home for two and a half hours.
I hit up HomeSense first, seeing as it was the first day of Autumn, then Winners. . .then I decided not to push my luck and left the mall to get some groceries at Wal-Mart (On a freaking Saturday! Never again. It was so busy!!)
After that I checked out London Drugs for some cosmetic bits and then headed to my parent's house to check in with my brother.
I mean, it's not a crazy day, but it's a lot for me. And I didn't have one panic attack!

Tomorrow I might even try my luck at a movie.
Scratch that, there's no early matinees.
I really want to see 'Life Itself', it looks like a me movie.
But tomorrow 'The Resident' season 2 premieres, so I kinda wanna watch that instead.

Anyone else watching 'Maniac' on Netflix?
It's interesting, I found the first episode very slow.  I liked the second and third episode a lot.
I think I'm on the fourth...
I'm also watching 'Hilda' which is pretty relaxing and easy to watch.


By now I'm sure you've realized my best friend is Netflix.


[I just realized I need to update my 'about me' section, as I am no longer a "twenty year old something blogger".]

What Do You Do On A Friday Night?

But honestly.

I rarely get to treat a Friday night like a 'Friday Night', but tonight I do.


So, this Friday night I got home, looked at my laundry, decided no, and poured a glass of wine.
I then proceeded to get into my comfy uniform (leggings, a t-shirt, this sweater, and some kind of wool/worker man sock [can't think of what they're actually called])

I then lit every candle in my living room and turned on my fairy lights.
Then it was really a toss between checking out the new show 'Maniac' on Netflix or watching youtube,
I chose Spotify for about half an hour and then let my curiosity get the best of me and watched one episode of 'Maniac'.
I am intrigued.

Then I watched two episodes of "Summer Camp Island", all of which I've already seen, but I love that show.

By this time I think I was two glasses of wine in and had decided to make a quesadilla .
Not much time had passed after the quesadilla that I decided to make chocolate chip cookies.
I also talked to My Love, who is working away at the moment (it's that time of year, hence the wine),

And now here we are, three glasses of wine and two cookies later.

It's not even nine thirty yet.
Do I go to bed?
Do I watch more 'Maniac'?
Read a book?
Or browse the interwebs?


What do you do on a Friday night?

The Emmy's

I have not watched The Emmy's in a long time, but seeing as there are some shows I've been into I thought I would.
The big one for me is The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.
I am a Gilmore Girl lover, therefore an Amy Sherman-Palladino lover.

So I am so fucking stoked that they have so far won four emmy's.   Four!
Like I turned it on a little late but every winner was for the show!

And good God, this woman is gorgeous.

And then freakin' Alex Borstein. I really enjoyed her speech, it was short and sweet and made me cry as most speeches do from actors I like.

I feel like I've been waiting forever for this show to start season 2!

Fuck, I love award shows.
Usually I'm more a Golden Globes/Oscars kind of gal, but like I said, I've been into some more tv shows as of late.

I always dreamed I would be on one of these shows one day.
I used to act and I promised myself I would take my youngest brother to the Oscars one day, if I made it, as he and I always shared acting in common.
Who knows, maybe I'll start acting classes again in the new year.

Lots of previews are on the tv right now, anyone else watch The Resident?
Love that show. . .because of Matt Czuchry.


Aw Jeff Daniels, I liked his speech.
It was funny but I still cried, of course.
I'm scared that I'll be old when I follow my dream.

This feels good, this feels like my old Oscar blogs.
Mostly I was commenting on the fashion, but nonetheless it still feels good.

Man, Betty White looks so great for 96 years old.

Aw Ryan Murphy, I've never heard him speak before and his speech made me cry.

. . . .

Claire Foy looks gorgeous, I don't think I've ever seen her in anything.
Anyone else think her and Sarah Paulson look alike?
I think it's just certain features, but seeing them apart is just whoa..I'm sure if they were side by side it'd be different.

What shows are you guys stoked for?
American Horror Story already started and I'm into it.
I'm excited for The Resident (as I said above), This is Us, South Park, Tosh.0, Single Parents and The Cool Kids.

I just finished re-watching Gossip Girl and now I'm onto Stranger Things...again.

I think if I was ever attending an award show I would be a blubbering mess, could you imagine if I had to give a speech? Fuck that, it would just be blubber blubber I love you handsome, blubber blubber I love you parents, blubber some more.

Omg, of course Sarah Paulson would  announce that Claire Foy wins. Ha!
I'm very drawn to her, I need to watch things she's in.


----------------------
15 minutes left.
The last 45mins to an hour have not been exciting.
-----
YES!!!!
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel won best comedy series!
I couldn't be happier for them.

Confessions Of A Boring Girl 2.0

I think. . .
I think I'm going to reinstate my old blog.

So, apparently I deleted it off this account and can no longer go back in and access the whole myroomisred link.  Which is probably good because I no longer live in that red room and it is also no longer red!

Yeah, I'm going to do it.
I miss that girl.
I've turned into a more anxious girl in the last few years, yet my life has gotten better.
Let's channel this Boring Girl, because she is still boring...probably more so now.

So I know a lot of the ones I kept in contact with are long gone now, like, Lauren, Chelsea(x2), Bee, & Cindy.
Those are the ones I remember the best, sorry if I've forgotten others, but any contact is appreciated (I live a boring life).

I apologize for the language but, getting older fucking sucks.

I'm thirty now.
What the hell?
I was twenty four when I had my blog and had friends on here.
Back then life seemed so exciting.
What I remember most is that it was 2009, my Grandpa had just passed away (fucking pancreatic cancer) and I was finally treated for my thyroid and it was like all of a sudden after his funeral it all clicked into place.
All of a sudden I had two jobs, one at a bookstore (that only stuck for four months) and one at a grocery store as their day time maintenance(which stuck for four years, one two year relationship, one breakup, and another relationship which has turned into a three year engagement).

Fuck. Really?  Fuck has been a favorite word of mine this year.  But like seriously, has that all happened? You guys don't even know the half of it yet!

So let's ignore the bookstore job, because nothing really happened there except the fact that I didn't know a cute guy was flirting with me (yes, I had to be told a guy was flirting with me)

Okay so last time I posted on Confessions Of A Boring Girl was quite ominous. 

I'm even playing the video I posted right now and that song just takes me back every time.
I remember that morning perfectly (and I totally just realized something else now too but I'll get to it..remind me) So I posted that on July 17th 2012
But everything had happened quite a bit before, and that quote I posted it just so perfect and I feel like that movie is just it for my life.

Tom: "What happened? Why - why didn't they work out?"

Summer: "What always happens. Life."

Fuck.


This is the longest post I've done ever on this blog.
Long story short, I was dating a guy and we were not in a good place, we went out for a friend's birthday and I ended up running into a guy we both used to work with and that I kind of always flirted with.  This guy and I ended up dancing (I hate calling him this guy) and my current boyfriend didn't like it, but we were honestly just goofing, like it wasn't seductive dancing.
Then at one point this song I really liked came on and it had come on earlier and my boyfriend didn't want to dance to it, but when it came on again this guy did and I just took it as this sign.
-Back story real quick.  This guy and my current boyfriend and basically everyone else I was with worked at the same store all together one point in time. We always kind of flirted and even got in trouble for it.-
So anyways, we danced to this song and he went for the kiss, I told him I couldn't and he backed off and understood.
I told him I was sorry and that I liked him but I just couldn't do that to somebody.
Funny thing, we both aren't facebook fans and I asked him if he had facebok, he did.

The walk home was long, my ex and I bickered back and forth, as yes I get that I danced with this other guy but it wasn't close and nothing happened, but he didn't get that.  I mean, I totally knew was I was doing, I wasn't that intoxicated and I definitely had a crush on this other guy at some point and had thought about him after he left the store.

[Omg, get on with it woman.]

My ex slept at my house, I can clearly remember "him" facing the wall and me facing the other way.  I was just too nice to make "him" walk home that late.

[I'm that girl who everyone thinks of as a friend, if you couldn't figure that out already]

So the next morning, I like to refer to it as the 'Morning After', I went to meet my Mom for coffee at Blenz, our usual Sunday meet up (remember this), where I spilled everything to her.
After that I went and had a nice long walk at the beach, thinking about everything, while listening to this song:


Needless to say, within days we were broken up.
I remember on my brother's birthday that everyone had their significant others there except me, so that was at least 5 days after.  That night I remember laying in my parent's drive way on the phone with The Ex crying, wondering if we had done the right thing and wondering what I would do without "him" because he had been my best friend for almost 3 years.

That was a rough night.

But within days this other guy contacted me on the hated Facebook.
I hate Facebook but at the same time I thank so much for it, I don't know where I would be right now without it to be honest.
So he contacted me, gave me his cell number on there and six years later here we are engaged.

You guys have no idea how much I thank my friend for having her birthday that night and going to that bar.
I really used to question that whole fate shit and that night made me really believe in that.
You have no idea.

This man, my love, I always would write in old blogs and journal entries how he used to make me feel like I was hanging out with my best friend I had growing up and, you guys, it's still like that.

He makes me laugh everyday, he makes it hard to be mad at him, and he just is my favorite person ever.
Fuck, I love him so much.

So, that's life, basically, up to date.

Let's get back into this Confessions Of A Boring Girl groove shall we?



Oh and The Ex?
They ended up deciding they were meant to be female.




[Editing me]
You may also be wondering why I was making you remember about that morning after and that coffee at Blenz with my Mom.
Well, just about every Sunday my fiancee and I meet my Mom for coffee at that same Blenz.
Ironic?







[2nd editing me]
Tom was right.
I've been watching that scene over and over and it just so fits what happened in my life.
You only know a small part of it, and a large part of it was I didn't want to belong to someone but I always felt this other guy was "it" and he is. 
And just, how can some scene in a movie fit so perfectly in your life?
[P.S. I've been bawling for the past, oh 20-30 mins, about this.]


















 

Burn Out

Let's talk about job burn-out.
I just had last week off, which was good timing because I was really starting to feel the effects of burnout.
I'm back this week and the week is good, but I don't feel like I've had a week off.
The unfortunate thing is that everyone at work feels this way.

I was going to come on here and suggest some things to avoid burn out, but guess what? I have no tips.
No one wants my advice because it comes in a wine glass.
That's not really a solution, is it?

I know that exercising is a good one, kind of.
I mean you'll be more tired but still feel from working out.
But guess what? I don't have the energy to do that plus I've got this stupid anxiety and panic disorder that weighs me down.
Plus I'm an introvert that deals with the (very demanding and exhausting) public all day, so I am drained after my day.

It's weird, I'm so introverted that a day with people has me exhausted so bad that I just need to cry, but I could do a hike and having a even busier day cleaning or doing manual labor and be totally fine.
Actually at my last job I had a physically demanding janitor job and I was less exhausted after a full day of that working 6 days a week than I am at my current job.

Okay, I'm done bitching.
Someone just give me advice on avoiding all this exhaustion, please?

Autumn is Almost Here!

It's finally September!!
If only you could see me now, I am in my element.
I've had the past week off and I've been cooking, lots, drinking wine (of course) while I cook, had the Autumn playlist on, lit the candles, decorated the house etc.
You know, all things Autumn.

I love this cozy time.
I am used to the rain where I live, but there is something about a sunny Fall day that just *sigh*, it gets me.

It's raining out right now, I have wonton soup simmering, and a glass of wine by my side.  It's been an almost perfect day.
My Love is still at work, but will be home soon.  I love being a housewife when I'm not working, is that weird?

I finished reading one of my favorite Fall reads again, "Prettygirl13" by Liz Coley.  I don't want to say what it's about because it'll give way too much away but I love it and I reread it every year at least once.

It's hard to believe Canadian Thanksgiving is only a month away now!  Thanksgiving rivals Christmas for me.  I love Christmas, but sometimes it gets a little stressful, where Thanksgiving is just cook and eat.  I love to eat.

Have you guys been watching any Autumn movies?
Not gonna lie, I start watching Autumn themed movies in August.
I've watched "Hocus Pocus" a few times, it's one of my favorite movies in general though.  My birthday is in March and at my seventh birthday my parents put it on to calm me down, as I was overwhelmed, and to distract the other kids.
I finally watched "Autumn in New York" and "The Dead Poet's Society", I really enjoyed them both and will add them to the Fall rotation.
Other Autumn movies I've watched, in list form because that is my way:
-"You've Got Mail"
-"Practical Magic"
-"Coraline"
-"October Kiss" (twice, I'm addicted)
-"Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"
and then I of course have been into "Gossip Girl" like every Fall and then I just finished "Summer Camp Island"...which not very Autumnal but still put me in the mood.
Last night I went and saw "The Nun", I really liked it but my mom found it boring...so you'll have to figure that one out on your own. 


Leave me some Autumn movies/tv shows to watch down below and I will for sure check them out.